The Wedding Season Arrives, But At What Cost?
By: Javid Amin
Srinagar 21 April 2025: As the Valley welcomes the arrival of the much-anticipated wedding season, excitement fills the air. Markets are abuzz, tailors work overtime, and invitation cards are dispatched in bulk. However, amid the vibrant hustle, a harsh reality persists: weddings, once sacred and simple, are now an exhibition of wealth, social competition, and at times, financial devastation.
This article takes an in-depth look at the escalating wedding culture in Kashmir, the widening social divide it creates, and why it’s time to return to the beautiful simplicity that Islam advocates through the Nikkah.
Weddings in Kashmir – A Tradition Wrapped in Social Pressure
In Kashmiri culture, weddings are deeply cherished family events. But what was once an occasion of love and community has gradually morphed into a commercial extravaganza. From multi-day feasts to expensive designer outfits and over-decorated venues, modern weddings have become more about “keeping up appearances” than celebrating the sacred bond of Nikkah.
The Rise of Lavish Spending: A Statistical Overview
Recent studies by local social welfare NGOs indicate:
- Average cost of a Kashmiri wedding in 2010: Rs. 4-6 lakh.
- Average cost in 2024: Rs. 15-25 lakh.
- Percentage of families taking loans for weddings: Estimated at 35%.
- Percentage of young marriages delayed due to financial constraints: More than 45%.
These numbers tell a worrying tale. The pressure to meet societal standards forces families to host weddings that far exceed their financial capabilities.
Financial Stress and Social Inequality
The modern Kashmiri wedding often involves:
- Booking grand banquet halls.
- Hiring professional event planners.
- Hosting multi-course Wazwan feasts for hundreds of guests.
- Ordering imported decorations and custom wedding dresses.
The Debt Trap
Families with modest means frequently:
- Take personal loans from banks or money lenders.
- Sell property to finance wedding expenses.
- Cut back on other essentials like education or healthcare.
All for the sake of a few days of celebration, the financial burden of which can last for years.
The Emotional Toll
- Anxiety: Parents feel pressured to match community standards.
- Delays in marriage: Young couples wait years until their families can afford a grand event.
- Social alienation: Those who cannot meet expectations often feel marginalized or judged.
The Spiritual Essence of Nikkah
Islam beautifully simplifies the process of marriage. According to the Hadith:
“The most blessed Nikkah is the one with the least expenses.” (Ibn Majah)
A Nikkah is meant to be simple, accessible, and spiritually profound. The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) encouraged ease in marriage arrangements to ensure that love and companionship are valued over material extravagance.
Social Media – A Catalyst for Show-Off Culture
The digital age has made weddings more about presentation than participation. Carefully curated photoshoots, extravagant pre-wedding videos, and viral Instagram posts fuel the “show-off culture” that pressures couples and families to stage their weddings as “social media-worthy” events.
A Community Call to Action
Solutions to Simplify Weddings in Kashmir:
- Encourage Small Gatherings: Limit guest lists to immediate family and close friends.
- Promote the Sunnah Model: Focus on the Nikkah ceremony itself, rather than the after-party.
- Community Fund Initiatives: Pool resources to support low-income families in hosting dignified but simple weddings.
- Banquet Hall Reforms: Regulate pricing and discourage unnecessary decorations.
- Educational Campaigns: Use mosques, schools, and social platforms to raise awareness about the benefits of simple weddings.
Leading by Example
It starts with individuals and families brave enough to break free from societal pressure. Choosing to host an intimate, simple wedding sets a powerful precedent for others to follow. Community leaders and influencers have a major role to play in changing perceptions and normalizing the beauty of simplicity.
Bottom-Line: A Return to Love and Simplicity
Marriage is not meant to be an economic burden. It is a sacred union based on mutual respect, love, and compassion. Simplified weddings reflect this essence and promote social equality, mental peace, and financial stability for all.
It is time for Kashmir to re-embrace the true spirit of Nikkah and celebrate the bond of marriage in its purest form: with humility, spirituality, and joy.
